A Dad’s Thoughts on the Births of Luciana and Stella
Water broke 230am ish. Mom talked about how she wasn’t sure if it was really water breaking… we looked up on internet and confirmed. Then tried to sleep a bit, then contractions started. Mom puked. We texted doula. Tried still laying down… around 430 maybe we decided that the contractions were more regular. Started timing and they were at least once every three minutes. Dani was in a lot of pain, walking around a bit more. She puked a couple more times, and kept walking around. I rubbed her back at times, at other times, I couldn’t do anything to make her feel better. Around 4:30 I decided sleep was out of the question and made sure the bags were packed. I made a bowl of oatmeal and walked the dogs. I packed the car, and around 6:15 we left for the hospital. We called Danielle, the doula on the way and she said she was still about 90 minutes out. She had left a vacation in NJ to try to meet us at the hospital. She called Emily, the back-up doula, and said she would be at the hospital around 7.
When we arrived at the hospital, Dani was very uncomfortable and I couldn’t find a good place to park, so I pulled into the emergency parking area, then backed up because it said Police parking only. Dani was not happy I was backing up so I decided to park there after all. I ran inside and checked with the security guard what I should do and he said bring her in. I did and some folks ran up with a wheelchair. I walked with her into the ER and another lady said “you need to come with me and get a pass”. I didn’t even think to yell out to Dani, I’ll be right there! I went and reparked the car after having to drive a few blocks to get into the garage. I went in, got my badge, and headed for the 16th floor.
They must have known me when I walked in because they said, head left, first door on the right, room on the left. Folks were surrounding Dani, trying to get monitoring stuff on her belly to check baby heart rates and contractions. They also found she was 7 cm dilated! Dani was more comfortable standing than laying on the bed, so she didn’t get the straps on her in triage.
It wasn’t long before we walked over to 1602, a delivery room. They were able to convince Dani to lay on the bed there for a while in between contractions to get her strapped up. Dr. Mudd said we should go to the OR immediately and she should consider an epidural. Dani was strong and said she didn’t think she would need it but if she did, she would ask for it. I said, I don’t think we need to go to the OR quite yet. I also asked if they had gotten enough of a reading on the babies and contractions so they could unstrap Dani from the monitoring machines and they confirmed they had so Dani could stand up. Emily arrived shortly thereafter and helped take over for me massaging/applying pressure on Dani’s back. A few contractions later, they checked Dani and said she was 7-8 cm dilated. Dr. Mudd said we should go to the OR now and Emily nodded to me that it sounded like a good idea.
We walked to the OR, with an entourage of me, Emily, and two doctors. I brought my camera and a Styrofoam cup of water with a straw for Dani so she could continue to hydrate. When we got to the door, I had to put on a blue suit, shirt and pants, hair net, shoe nets, and facemask before I could enter the OR. This was probably about 7:45 to 8:00 am. There was a large group of people assembling in the room. In the middle was a tiny bed and there were machines and gadgets strewn around the rest of the room. I found a chair behind Dani’s left shoulder while Emily continued to apply pressure to Dani’s back. One of the nurses told me there was another chair, so I moved in closer, by Dani’s right shoulder. She laid on her side for a while and asked me to get her some water. I went to get the Styrofoam cup and the anesthesiologist sharply told me that was a bad idea in case she needed to go under, so I reluctantly put it back on the ground and took my seat again.
Dani continued to contract for a few minutes and then said, I think I’m ready to push, quietly. No one really heard her and the setting of the OR had me a bit shell-shocked so I didn’t speak up either. Up until this moment, during each contracting she had moaned loudly and was very vocal in that respect. But now she had drawn quiet. She said it again a minute later and they told her to lay on her back and pull her knees up and push when she felt like it, drawing her breath in and holding while pushing for a count of 10, then breathing out and drawing the breath back in, and repeating. I heard one of the doctors, Dr. Atlas, perhaps remark how long Dani’s legs were and the stirrups or what-have-yous were not suited for her length. Around this point, Dani noticed the massive crowd that had gathered and remarked, “there are a lot of people in here!” She then closed her eyes so she could focus without having to look at all those people. I counted, and at that moment, there were 16 people in the room altogether. Dani contracted, pushed, took breaks, making little to no noise when pushing, then gasping for air at the end of each push. Emily had one hand under her back on one side of the table and I had one hand under her back on the other side, rubbing her head and shoulder with my other. She said the pressure helped to support her back. Danielle arrived shortly after and I was happy to see another friendly face. She stood behind me by Dani’s right shoulder and looked on.
The crowd was very vocally supportive of Dani at this point, saying things like good job, you’re doing awesome, you’re doing great… I was still shell-shocked at how fast things were moving and I told Dani “you’re doing great, hon” or “sweetie” here and there but I was thinking, gee, I’m not saying it enough or loud enough so I’m glad these other people are compensating. Mudd was very vocal in her support, and sounded genuinely happy when she said “that was a great push!”. It wasn’t long before one of the doctors said she could see a head. Another nurse asked if I wanted to see, so I stood up, looked to my right and I could see a little sliver of a haired-head peeking out! I sat down and then after a while, the nurse said I could continue to watch, so I did. Watching Dani push and seeing the baby’s head move was really neat! The docs seemed to know she was close and it was maybe 5 or 6 more pushes before the head seemed to really poke out. There was a lot of blood, it seemed to me, but the docs weren’t worried. They used their fingers to clear a little bit of space around the baby’s head.
More to come...
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